Good morning and welcome to Friday. In case you were wondering: 

• The ​​Kool-Aid Man is estimated to be 6 feet tall
• Have glasses 3.6 inches thick
• And weigh 5,800 pounds – without liquid. When filled with 600+ gallons of liquid, he weighs in at 11,000 lbs, roughly the same as an elephant.

Put that in your useless knowledge pipe and smoke it.

🚀⏰ Ready, Set, Go: Today’s news takes 4.21 minutes to read.

"Admire as much as you can. Most people do not admire enough."

–Vincent van Gogh (1853-1890)

☝️ Ukraine’s military said it destroyed a Russian-occupied port facility in the Azov Sea along with a Russian warship stationed there, as the conflict in Ukraine officially passed the one-month mark.

• During a summit of NATO leaders in Brussels, President Biden announced a series of sanctions targeting 300+ Russian ‘elites’; the G-7 and EU also unveiled new measures cracking down on Russian efforts to evade current sanctions.
• Senate Armed Services Chair Jack Reed (D-RI) said an unconventional biological, chemical or nuclear weapons attack could trigger a NATO response if it impacted neighboring countries.
• The US will welcome up to 100,000 Ukrainian refugees, according to Biden administration officials; over 10 million people have been displaced from their homes and more than 3.7 million have fled the country, per the UN.

How the invasion is impacting…

📈 Markets: US stocks recouped most of Wednesday’s losses, while oil fell 2.3% to roughly $112 per barrel. (Dow: +1.0% | S&P: +1.4% | Nasdaq: +1.9%)

• The Moscow Exchange rose yesterday in a limited trading session, its first since the invasion began. Foreigners were prevented from selling shares, which drew the ire of the White House.

🌾 Food: Western sanctions on Russia, the world’s biggest exporter of nitrogen fertilizers, have disrupted supply chains and dried up global supplies. Fertilizer prices jumped 10% last week and 40% from the previous month, per the Green Markets North America Fertilizer Price Index.

🇺🇸 The US saw its largest death spike in more than a century in the first year of the pandemic, according to Census Bureau data published yesterday. There were 535,000 more deaths in 2020 than the previous year, representing a 19% increase.

• Half of states saw more deaths than births, a phenomenon called "natural decrease." Per the Census Bureau, this trend was particularly clear in the Northeast and the South.
• The data also show that Americans left the country's most-populous cities in droves (☝️), with NYC, LA, Chicago and San Francisco losing a combined 700,000 people from July 2020 to July 2021.
• On the flip side, nearly three out of five US counties (58%) experienced population growth over that same period, driven largely by some rural areas and smaller cities like Boise, ID, and Myrtle Beach, SC.

📸 The big picture: The world’s population is expected to virtually stop growing by the end of this century for the first time in modern history, due in large part to falling global fertility rates, according to a Pew Research analysis of UN data.

• Birth rates are falling in many European countries, the US and China. More than half of the global population growth between now and 2050 is expected to occur in Africa – and by 2100, the continent is projected to host five of the world’s 10 largest countries.

+For us visual learners… 👇

After years of fighting tooth and nail, Uber and taxis are starting to play nice. The ride-hailing giant will list all New York City taxis, including the iconic yellow cabs, on its app starting later this spring, the WSJ first reported yesterday.

🚗 Driving the deal (we really gotta stop w/ the transportation puns)… The coupling comes on a wave of overseas Uber + taxi partnerships in Spain, Colombia, South Korea, Germany, Austria and Turkey, and is the first citywide partnership in the city of New York – one of the ride-hailing giant’s most lucrative markets.

• Taxis took a hit because of the pandemic, and are looking for a way to make up for some of those losses.
• Uber has the demand, but is dealing with an ongoing driver shortage – and this partnership adds ~14,000 taxis to its NYC arsenal.
• The ride-hailing giant also says 35% of people who started using the app to hail taxis went on to use other Uber products, like UberEats.

📝 Zoom in: For riders in NYC, the rate for a taxi should be roughly the same as an Uber X.

🚕 Zoom out: By 2025, Uber says it wants to list every taxi in the world on its app.

🐠🎶 Just keep swimming… Paying attention these days isn’t easy. Many of us have heard the factoid about our attention spans now being worse than those of goldfish. 😬

📉 Some estimates say that attention spans have suffered 25% in the last few years alone!

And when it comes to learning, it’s making a difficult job even harder.

🤯 Did you know?… Between 30 and 40% of the population is thought to be neurodiverse. This includes conditions like ADHD and Autism Spectrum Disorder, which can make staying engaged and learning more challenging.

That’s why Hedgehog Health developed the Hoglet.

🐭 Reimagining the mouse… after hundreds of feedback sessions, Hedgehog Health learned that kids respond to the following:

• Squishiness
• Nubby texture
• Bright, vivid hues

🦔 Hedgehog Health put those ingredients together with a computer mouse, and the Hoglet was born.

Fidget toys are proven to help certain individuals stay focused. However, many schools don’t allow them into computer labs. The Hoglet solves this issue by serving as a functional fidget. 👌

“It’s so awesome. I love the way it feels on my hand while I use the computer.” -Braxton, age 6

➡️ Get the Hoglet today and save $30!

💊 Researchers at the University of Minnesota are expected to begin testing a male birth control pill on human patients by the end of the year.

• The scientists said their treatment proved to be 99% effective in mice with no observable side effects.
• Rather than using hormones, like the female birth control pill, the new male contraceptive targets the body’s interactions with Vitamin A, a key component in fertility.
• When male mice were given the pill for four weeks, researchers noted a significant drop in semen that rendered them effectively sterile. And after treatments were stopped, all of the mice returned to normal within four to six weeks.

✋ Yes, but… History is littered with examples of pharma giants and universities attempting – and failing – to create a safe and effective birth control pill for men after the female equivalent was discovered in the 1950s.

• No such treatment has ever made it past human clinical trials; many scientists chalk it up to the biological challenge – a man makes millions of sperm every single day, while women’s ovaries usually release one mature egg each month.

♂️ Zoom out: A male contraceptive gel created by UC Davis Health researchers is currently in the midst of a two-year, Phase 2 human clinical trial. (A gel-based, non-hormonal contraceptive for women received FDA approval in 2020.)

• A separate "testicle-bath" male contraceptive won the 2021 Dyson Award for Engineering, though it has yet to undergo any human trials.

• ☝️ The Batman director Matt Reeves released a deleted scene yesterday featuring ‘Pat-Bat’ facing off against the Joker (played by Barry Keoghan).

BUSINESS & MARKETS

• 💼 New jobless claims fell last week to their lowest level since 1969, according to Labor Department figures.
• ✈️ Southwest Airlines is launching a new, second-cheapest class of airfare that’ll allow travelers to make same-day changes to their tickets without having to pay more.
• 🛰️💰 SpaceX is bumping up prices for its Starlink internet service, citing inflationary pressures; the monthly charge will now be $110 instead of $99.
• 💻 London police arrested seven teenagers yesterday in connection to the Lapsus$ hacking group; it's allegedly led by a 16-year-old from Oxford.

SPORTS, MEDIA & ENTERTAINMENT

• 🗽 Mayor Eric Adams reversed NYC’s vaccine mandate for athletes and performers; the move means Brooklyn Nets guard Kyrie Irving is now eligible to play in home games.
• 🤼‍♂️ UFC fighter Jorge Masvidal was arrested in Miami Beach, FL, on felony charges related to an alleged assault on rival fighter Colby Covington (who defeated Masvidal in a match earlier this month).
• 🏀 The Sweet Sixteen for men’s March Madness tipped off yesterday; #1 seeds Gonzaga and Arizona went down; the men's Elite Eight starts tomorrow; the women’s Sweet Sixteen begins today. (Men’s bracket | Women’s bracket)

SCIENCE, SPACE & EMERGING TECH

• 🩸 Microplastics were found in human blood for the first time, per research published in the peer-reviewed journal Environment International.
• 🇵🇪 The ancient Incan city of Machu Picchu should actually be called just ‘Picchu’ or ‘Huayna Picchu', according to a new analysis of historical documents.
• 📸☀️ A European probe captured the closest images of the sun ever taken.

EVERYTHING ELSE

• 📊 Americans tend to overestimate minority populations and underestimate majority populations, according to polling from YouGov.
• 💧 FreeWater is a startup that fulfills its name by handing out water bottles paid for by brands that advertise on them.
• ⚖️ Former President Trump is suing Hillary Clinton, the DNC and others for $72+ million for allegedly conspiring to “weave a false narrative” that his 2016 campaign colluded with Russia. (From the Left | From the Right)

💬 Quoted… "Never tell us again our army does not meet NATO standards."

• Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky addressed a summit of NATO leaders in Brussels via video link yesterday. 

🏢 Stat of the Day: Half of workers would rather quit than be told to return to full-time, in-person work, according to a survey from HR consultancy firm Robert Half.

🤯 Did You Know?... The Animal Planet reality series River Monsters ended because star Jeremy Wade was able to catch basically every exceptionally large freshwater fish species on the planet, leaving no remaining content for the show.

📖 Worth a Read: An Alleged Fraud Uncovered by a Short Seller Ends in Gunfire → (WSJ)

🍩 DONUT HQ is located in the city of Austin, which has a motto: “Keep Austin Weird.” In celebration of that sentiment, we bring you the most unusual, off-the-wall and occasionally laugh-out-loud headlines from this week… (P.S. This week’s section is sponsored by the city of Miami.*)

1. 252 people wearing lion costumes set a world record in Ireland (Wicklow People)
2. First patient to communicate via brain implant asks to hear Tool album (Lambgoat)
3. Thief caught on camera burglarizing Miami shoe store, leaves with 20 left sneakers (WSVN 7News)
4. Miami spent $350,000 on new park lights. The park closes at sundown. (WLRN)
5. ‘He just said, I give up’: Redding police officer credits mustache for taming donkey (Record Searchlight)
6. Wife's need for a bathroom break leads man to $200,000 lottery prize (UPI)

*We kid, we kid

12-year-old Tommy Rhomberg was heartbroken when he witnessed the devastation a late-summer derecho brought to his Iowa hometown. 

• Wanting to help in any way possible, the boy turned his talents into a clever fundraiser – making and selling baseball bats out of wood brought down by the storm. 

⚾️ Knocking it out of the park... Tommy has made over 200 bats and donated more than $4,000 to storm relief funds.

🕶 Guess Who… Below you’ll find some of the IMDb movie credits of an unnamed actor/actress. Your task? Tell us who it is.

• Zootopia
• Prometheus
• Thor: Ragnarok
• Thor: The Dark World
• Avengers: Age of Ultron
• Star Trek: Beyond
• The Dark Tower
• Molly’s Game
• Beasts of No Nation
• Concrete Cowboy
• The Suicide Squad
• Pacific Rim

(keep scrolling for the answer)

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Idris Elba