Good morning. We’ve got some breaking news that’s so shocking, so explosive, so paradigm-shifting that it should probably take up today’s entire newsletter.

According to the weirdly well-run 2023 Original Tooth Fairy Poll by Delta Dental, the average payoff from the Tooth Fairy has increased by 16% over the last year to reach $6.23.

There’s more: In the last 25 years, the average cost per tooth (cpt) has skyrocketed by 379%, from $1.30 to $6.23 (the cost of eggs only increased by 177% during the same period😳).

Naturally, we had a lot of questions – but unfortunately the Tooth Fairy couldn’t be reached for comment.

The dental devil is always in the dental details, though: upon further inspection of the poll, we saw that the data is provided by PARENTS. Not kids, and not the Tooth Fairy. Sure, parents want everyone thinking tooth prices are going up… how else are they gonna convince kids to lose their baby teeth?

Obviously, there’s a lot here. Take some time to process with your families and, only once ready, continue onto THE NEWS!

🚀⏰ Ready, Set, Go: Today’s news takes 4.04 minutes to read.

“The secret of happiness, you see, is not found in seeking more, but in developing the capacity to enjoy less.”

–Socrates (470 B.C. – 399 B.C.)

Late last week, a federal court in New York ruled that emojis like 🚀,📈, and 💰 count as legal investment advice – even if the word “profit” is never mentioned.

The ruling came in a lawsuit filed against blockchain company Dapper Labs, which has been accused of violating US securities laws by offering its NBA Top Shot Moments products (more on that later).

🏀 Background: NBA Top Shot Moments are non-fungible tokens (NFTs) that feature top highlights and video clips from past NBA contests – like a game-winning shot by Steph Curry, or a chase-down block by LeBron James.

• The NFTs are initially created by Dapper Labs and sold to consumers, who can store them in a blockchain wallet or list the NFTs for resale on the Dapper Labs marketplace.
• And so far it’s been pretty successful: the Top Shot Marketplace surpassed $1 billion in all-time sales last May.

The lawsuit is claiming that Top Shot Moments have historically gained or lost value based on the performance of Dapper’s blockchain, so they should be classified as securities similar to stocks and bonds, as opposed to collectibles like sports memorabilia and fidget spinners.

🤔 So, where do emojis come in?... In last week’s ruling, federal judge Victor Marrero cited tweets from Dapper Labs that contained the three emojis shown above (🚀📈💰), saying these emojis “objectively mean one thing: a financial return on investment.”

And much like a planet-destroying asteroid headed towards the Moon, this ruling could have a big future impact. According to former SEC Branch Chief Lisa Braganca, it opens up the possibility of legal consequences for people or organizations that use any of those three emojis to imply future financial gains.

🇹🇷 Another earthquake struck southeastern Turkey yesterday, killing one person and injuring 100+ more. The 5.2-magnitude quake represented the second major aftershock to occur in Turkey this month, following an initial series of tremors near the Syrian border on February 6 that killed over 50,000 people, and destroyed or weakened tens of thousands of buildings. Over the weekend, Turkish authorities said they had arrested nearly 200 contractors connected to buildings that collapsed in the quakes.

🇬🇧🤝🇪🇺 The UK and EU agreed to a new deal aimed at fixing post-Brexit problems in Northern Ireland. UK PM Rishi Sunak said yesterday’s agreement, which came after years of negotiation, has three main components: 1) Creating new “red” and “green” vehicle lanes to improve the flow of trade between Great Britain and Northern Ireland; 2) Allowing the UK, instead of the EU, to determine the tax rates of goods and services in Northern Ireland; 3) An “emergency brake” allowing Northern Ireland to block any new EU laws from being imposed on the province.

🇷🇺 Vladimir Putin said Moscow will “take into account” the nuclear weapons capabilities of NATO in an interview on Sunday. The Russian president also claimed NATO’s main goal is to destroy and divide his country, a notion Putin has repeatedly used to justify Moscow’s ongoing invasion of Ukraine. His comments came less than a week after Putin suspended Moscow’s participation in the last remaining arms control treaty between Russia and the US, which included limits on nuclear capabilities. Separately, Saudi Arabia officially agreed on Sunday to send $100 million in humanitarian aid to Ukraine alongside $300 million worth of oil products.

+Update: Canada joined the EU and US in banning TikTok from all government-issued devices yesterday.

📊 Data is a commodity in the internet age, and data brokers profit off of internet users’ personal information. They buy and sell personal data like SINs, contact details, and physical addresses – usually without informed consent. Every time someone accepts cookies, downloads an app, or even just visits a website, data brokers harvest this personal information.

📞🤖 Why is this an issue? Because data brokers can’t be trusted with your data. They sell it to institutions – resulting in increased rates, denied loans, robocalls (ugh!) – or worse, to cybercriminals… aka not the people you want with your deets.

🥷 Incogni is a personal data removal service that fights tirelessly to keep your data safe. They monitor every type of data broker from all continents to get your data erased… a process that takes the average person about 304 hours.

The whole process is effortless and fully automated. Your data will be secure, and you’ll even be targeted less by daily spam.👌

Use DONUT10 to save 10% (or 55% off the annual plan) on Incogni today.

Good news, prospective renters: after rising more than 25% between January 2021 and August 2022, apartment prices have been dropping like an icicle held by a little kid with glass fingers.

Over the past six months through January, apartment rents have fallen in every major metropolitan area in America, while the US median rent decreased by $48 to reach $1,338, per new data from listing website Apartment List. It was the first time in five years that rent fell every month over a six-month period, per the same estimates.

And similar to your rock climbing cousin with a camper van, this drop hasn’t been isolated to a specific area. Since August, Seattle rents have dropped 8%, while new-lease rents in Boston and Las Vegas have fallen by 6%. None of the 52 largest metro areas tracked by the company saw positive rent growth over the period.

🏗👀 Looking ahead… While no one really knows where rents will go in 2023 – up, down, sideways, disappear entirely (🤞), etc. – many forecasts expect prices to increase, but at a much slower rate than over the past two years.

One thing helping that case? Nearly half a million new apartments will be available to rent this year – or the biggest delivery of new supply since 1986. And January data indicates this new supply may already be having an impact, the WSJ reports.

The next time someone complains that “Hollywood doesn’t make anything original anymore,” simply look them in the eyes and say two words: Cocaine Bear.

After exceeding industry expectations with a $23.1 million opening this past weekend, the biggest start for an R-rated film this year, Cocaine Bear has a lot of people asking, “Wait, what?”

The movie is loosely – and we do mean loosely – inspired by a true story, which started when former DEA agent/narcotics cop turned drug dealer Andrew Thorton III tossed 35 pounds of cocaine out of his plane, then died while trying to parachute out.

Four months later, a 175-pound black bear was found dead after reportedly consuming all 35 pounds of cocaine, earning him the nickname Pablo Eskobear.

🐻 Stranger than fiction: That’s about where the real-life story ends. But for director Elizabeth Banks and writer Jimmy Warden, that was only the beginning of a film that'd answer a simple question: what if that bear didn’t die but instead, ya know, went on a murderous rampage?

And if you’re wondering whether Cocaine Bear’s success will start a trend of drugged-up animal revenge movies, the answer is yes: the team behind Sharknado has already teased a summer release for a film called Attack of the Meth Gator.

💬 Quoted…​​ “Clearopathtra. Han Snowlo. Sleetwood Mac. Yer a Blizzard, Harry.”

Those are a few names – voted on annually by citizens – from the Minnesota government’s Class of 2023 Snowplows. And they’ve been hard at work these past few days, after the state (along with the rest of the upper MidWest) was hit with a storm system on Sunday and Monday that dropped up to 8 inches of snow in some areas.

• Outside of the MidWest, the major storm system has already drenched the West Coast and spawned tornadoes in the South.
• It’s projected to hit major cities in the Northeast starting this morning.

⚖️ Stat of the Day: 98% = the rate at which criminal cases in US federal courts end with plea bargains, per a new report from the American Bar Association.

🤯 Did You Know?... The reason you sometimes see combined Taco Bell/KFC/Pizza Hut locations is because Pepsi bought all three companies in the ‘70s and ‘80s to improve its market share relative to Coca-Cola; Pepsi later spun off its fast-food assets into a separate company called Yum! Brands.

📖 Worth a Read: Why I’m not writing about kids and screen time anymore → (WSJ)

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• ☝️ You’re looking at a retired Boeing 737 in Bali, Indonesia, that was recently transformed into a two-bedroom luxury villa; it opens to the public for $7,000/night starting in April.

BUSINESS & MARKETS

• 📊 US markets close up slightly (S&P: +0.3%; Dow: +0.2%; Nasdaq: +0.6%).
• 🚗⚡ Fisker shares jumped by 30% yesterday after confirming a spring delivery for its first EV car, the Ocean SUV; the EV startup plans on producing over 40,000 cars in 2023.
• 🚬 Altria, the company behind Marlboro, is close to acquiring e-cig company NJOY Holdings Inc. for more than $2.75 billion, per the WSJ.

SPORTS, MEDIA & ENTERTAINMENT

• ⚽📺 Apple released a full-length trailer for Ted Lasso season 3. | MLS Season Pass kicked off this past weekend on Apple TV.
• 🤖 Snapchat yesterday launched “My AI,” a chatbot running on a customized version of OpenAI’s ChatGPT. | Spotify has combined the “heart” and “add to playlist” buttons into a single plus button.
• 📱 Meta is funding “Take It Down,” an app designed to help teens prevent the posting and sharing of explicit images; the tool was launched yesterday by the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children.

SCIENCE, SPACE & EMERGING TECH

• 👩‍🔬🌌 NASA named Dr. Nicola Fox to serve as the agency’s new head of Science.
• 🔊 German scientists have created a machine that 3D-prints objects using only sound waves, per a new peer-reviewed study published in Science Advances.
• 🚀 SpaceX’s planned trip to deliver four astronauts to the ISS was scrubbed two minutes prior to launch early Monday morning due to a ground systems issue; the next attempt is scheduled for Thursday morning at 12:34am ET.

EVERYTHING ELSE

• 🎓 Colorado College announced plans to withdraw from the US News & World Report’s annual ranking of the nation’s best undergraduate colleges; it’s the highest-rated school to pull out of the undergrad rankings since 1995; the move comes after dozens of top universities withdrew from US News’ med and law school rankings over the past year. (Background)
• ⚖️ The Supreme Court agreed to hear a GOP-led case that challenges federal funding for the Consumer Finance Protection Bureau, which was created after the 2008 financial crisis. (From the Left | From the Center | From the Right)
• 📝 Florida Governor Ron DeSantis (R) yesterday signed a bill formally rescinding The Walt Disney Company's private control over a 39-square-mile district outside of Orlando where it operates its theme parks. (From the Left | From the Center | From the Right)

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Yesterday we covered the eight US government agencies that have investigated the origin of the Covid pandemic and the conclusions they reached. TL;DR: Two agencies think it most likely leaked from a Chinese lab, four think it most likely arose from natural transmission, and two are undecided.

❓ Our question to you: In your opinion, which of the following is the most likely explanation for Covid’s origin?

• 🧪 Lab-leak hypothesis: 65%
• 🦇 Natural transmission: 22%
• 🦠 Other: 13%

Click here to read some of the best responses.

+Note on sample size: We received 8,093 votes and 749 longform responses.

A decade ago, Lloyd Devereux Richards published Stone Maidens, the first book of a thriller series he poured his heart and soul into. 

But the book never took off, leaving Lloyd discouraged and disappointed for 11 years. He tried to remain positive, however, and never stopped writing.

📱 Where my readers at... When Lloyd's daughter, Marguerite, took to TikTok to share some details about Stone Maidens, she thought she would maybe garner a couple hundred views and a few dozen new readers for her dad. 

• 48 million views later, Lloyd's book had rocketed to the top of Amazon's list of best-selling thrillers.
• “My dad wasn’t really sure what TikTok is, but he has been so pleased and grateful,” Marguerite said. “I love how people are appreciating him."

❓ Trivia: Which Roman god was the son of Juno and Jupiter?

📅 True or False?... Frank Sinatra died the same night as the series premiere of Seinfeld.

🤔 Riddle Me This: If you drop me I’m sure to crack, but give me a smile and I’ll always smile back. What am I?

(keep scrolling for the answers)

👆 Check out the referral prizes you can get, just for introducing people you know to little old us. 

What to do: Copy your unique link below, then send it to anyone who you think would like the DONUT. Once you hit each milestone, you'll get an email with a link to claim your prize. (Pro tip: there's no need to ration points, you're entitled to a prize at each tier.)

Start referring.👇

❓ Trivia: Mars

📅 T/F: False, he died the same night of Seinfeld's series finale

🤔 Riddle: A mirror