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“Be not glad at the misfortune of another, though they may be your enemy. ”

–George Washington (1732-1799)

After nearly a year of testing and development, TikTok is rolling out TikTok Shop to all of its ~150 million US users.

Here’s how the feature works (if you’re not among the ~40% of US users who already have it available):

• Users are able to access TikTok Shop – basically a marketplace of various goods – either through a standalone tab called “Shop,” or via videos on their FYP containing products that link back to the Shop.
• Once a user is ready to check out from the Shop, they’ll be prompted to enter their details and pay right there; TikTok will be processing payments through its app, Bloomberg reports.
• The company has also built fulfillment centers, meaning it could potentially process the transaction, then ship orders straight to doors across the US. Think: Amazon, but with a wildly popular social media app attached (that already has a hashtag called #TikTokMadeMeBuyIt with ~70 billion views).

TikTok Shop isn’t without its issues, however. During beta testing, users and news orgs reported encountering a preponderance of cheap, knock-off goods made in China, and being overwhelmed with all of the products available (which range from a $2.99 apparently counterfeit Nike sweatshirt to a $6.99 statue of a “naughty dwarf” sitting on a toilet). Plus, the additional data the Chinese-headquartered app will need to collect in order to process and fulfill orders may put US regulators on further notice.

But TikTok Shop also has some things going for it, which is nice (s/o Caddyshack). The company says it’s already signed up 200,000 sellers to the platform, including big names like PacSun, Revolv, OtterBox, and Willow Boutique.

👀 Looking ahead… TikTok has set a goal to sell $20 billion worth of goods through its Shop tab over the rest of this year – so prepare to see more and more orange shopping cart icons on your FYP.

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If the Consumer Price Index, America’s most widely-used measure of inflation, was a fitness exercise, it would be a burpee – up, then down, then back up again.

According to Labor Department figures published yesterday, US inflation stood at 3.7% over the year-long period ending in August. That’s up from 3.2% in July and 3.0% in June, but down from a recent peak of 9.1% in June 2022.

On a month-to-month basis, the CPI rose 0.6% in August, representing the highest figure in over a year. A large portion of this increase can be attributed to gas prices, which rose 9.1% last month to reach a national average of $3.82/gallon.

• The core index, a separate reading that excludes often-volatile food and energy prices, rose 4.3% in August compared with a year earlier.
• That figure is down from 4.7% in July, and marks the smallest annual increase in core inflation since September 2021.

🏦👀 Looking ahead… There’s still a gap between the current core inflation reading (3.7%) and the Fed’s target rate of 2%. But a majority of economists expect the US central bank to hold off on raising interest rates in its upcoming meeting next week, though future rate hikes in November or December are on the table.

🇲🇽👽 A researcher presented what he claims are two alien corpses to a Mexican government committee. Jaime Maussan, a journalist and UFO researcher who has previously been connected to similar claims of extraterrestrials that were later proven false, testified under oath before Mexico’s congress yesterday that he uncovered the remains of the three-fingered aliens in Peru in 2017. Maussan claims researchers at the National Autonomous University of Mexico extracted DNA evidence from the corpses and, upon comparing it to other samples, found over 30% of their DNA was “unknown.”

🇬🇧🍺 The UK’s largest pub operator is rolling out surge pricing for beer. Stonegate, which owns popular chains like the Slug & Lettuce and Craft Union, has implemented price hikes of ~25 cents during busy times like weekends, similar to how airlines, hotels, ticket companies, and ride-share operators charge more during periods of high demand. The average cost of a pint of lager in a UK pub is currently $5.72, up from $4.62 in 2019, per government data.

🇳🇱🖼️ A Van Gogh painting stolen from a Dutch museum in 2020 was anonymously returned. Dutch art detective Arthur Brand, aka “the Indiana Jones of the art world,” said he was handed an Ikea bag by a man who came to his front door Monday night that contained the 139-year-old Spring Garden painting (worth between $4 million–$7 million). According to communications intercepted by police, the painting was stolen by an organized crime group in an attempt to negotiate a reduced sentence for one of their leaders.

If America was personified, it’d probably be as a hot girl – because it’s dealing with some stomach issues.

Surging US demand for laxatives – specifically polyethylene glycol 3350, the generic name for laxatives like Miralax and Glycolax – is leading to shortages and emptier shelves at the drugstore, the WSJ reports.

And that’s not the only, ehrm, movement-inducing substance Americans are purchasing in spades.

• Searches for laxative pills on Amazon have more than tripled in the past year, according to analytics company Pattern.
• Manufacturers of fiber supplements Metamucil and Benefiber have reported double-digit sales growth in recent years.

📈 Behind the trend… Experts point to an aging population that’s more likely to take medication causing constipation, and the fact that most Americans don’t consume enough fiber, which can lead to constipation. They also cite lingering effects from the pandemic – a time when many ate worse, exercised less, and experienced more anxiety – as contributing to bowel dysfunction.

But two other things could also be driving major demand: Ozempic and TikTok.

• Some laxative buyers appear to be using the medicine as a de facto Ozempic to lose weight, per the WSJ.
• #GutTok has north of 1.1 billion views on TikTok, with many of the videos making claims about the benefits of consuming polyethylene glycol 3350.

And this messaging seems to be having an impact. In addition to the polyethylene glycol shortage, Benefiber manufacturer Haleon told the WSJ that people aged 18-42 are increasingly focused on gut health, and are consuming its fiber supplements more than ever before.

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💬 Quoted… “Our nightmare is finally over and the good guys won."

Convicted murderer Danelo Cavalcante was recaptured by authorities yesterday following a two-week-long manhunt that saw Cavalcante evade a search perimeter maintained by hundreds of officers, steal (and then subsequently ditch) a van, break into a house and make off with a .22 rifle, and more.

• The fugitive was discovered using thermal imaging equipment, which was able to guide a tactical team to his specific location. Then, as Cavalcante was trying to crawl away from the area to escape capture, a police dog was released, successfully subduing him while inflicting “a minor bite wound” to his scalp. Doggos, ftw!

⏱️🚘 Stat of the Day: A UAW strike against the Big Three automakers – Ford, GM, and Stellantis – would cost the US economy at least $5.6 billion over its first ten days, per a recent analysis by Anderson Economic Group. Union leaders and company execs have a deadline of midnight tonight to reach a deal that avoids any strike. (Background)

🤔 Did You Know?... Across a selection of generic drugs that treat certain conditions like cancer or multiple sclerosis, the prices that pharmacy benefit managers CVS Health and Cigna offer to US insurers are at least 24x higher than what the drugs’ manufacturers charge, per a new WSJ investigative report.

📰 Worth a Read: Are superstar athletes good for the economy? → (The Hustle)

• ☝️ A team of Swiss university students set a new world record for the fastest 0 to 62 MPH by an electric vehicle (0.956 seconds).

BUSINESS & MARKETS

in partnership with The Average Joe

• 💰 US markets closed mixed across the board (S&P: +0.1%; Dow: -0.2%; Nasdaq: +0.3%). | 🏦 Citigroup is preparing for job cuts as it revamps its corporate structure to five main divisions.
• 🎰🌐 MGM Resorts said an ongoing cyberattack that has disrupted properties across the US since Sunday represents a material risk to the company; MGM’s corporate email, restaurant reservation, digital room keys, and hotel booking systems remain offline as a result of the attack. | 🎲💵 Caesars Entertainment reportedly paid tens of millions to hackers who broke into the company’s system in recent weeks.
• 🚀 SpaceX is no longer taking a loss to produce and sell Starlink satellite antennas to consumers, the company revealed yesterday.

*From our partners: 🍩📈 The Average Joe’s free investing newsletters are practically made for DONUT Readers – simple, concise, and packed with market trends and insights. Join 160,000+ investors and sign up free.

SPORTS, MEDIA & ENTERTAINMENT

• 🏸🤝 The Major League Pickleball merger is back on: MLP agreed to join forces with the PPA Tour, its main rival league, following a disagreement on the terms of their original merger announced in November.
• 📰🎤 Gannett, America's largest newspaper chain, is hiring two full-time reporters who will exclusively cover Taylor Swift and Beyoncé.
• 🎮 Unity, the tech company that developed one of the most popular engines for creating video games, is facing backlash after announcing a new fee structure tied to how many players install each game.

SCIENCE, SPACE & EMERGING TECH

in partnership with DeLo-xx

• 🛌 People who are night owls have a significantly higher risk of developing Type 2 diabetes and other adverse health conditions compared to early risers, per a new peer-reviewed study.
• 🛸 A panel of NASA-commissioned experts is set release its first report on how to better collect and analyze data regarding UAPs.
• 🏛️🤖 A group VIPs in the US tech industry – including Elon Musk, Sundar Pichai, Mark Zuckerberg, and Bill Gates – gathered yesterday for a closed-door Senate summit on artificial intelligence.

*From our partners: 🤤🍫 Enter chocolate wonderland… DeLo-xx’s chocolate fondue kits create a unique experience and unforgettable memories. Featuring premium dippables and the world’s finest single-origin chocolate, use code DONUT for a special price on DeLo’s Gold Kit.

MISCELLANEOUS

• 🛳️ A luxury cruise ship carrying 206 passengers is stuck in the Greenland Arctic until Friday; the vessel ran aground in a remote area without anyone available nearby to help.
• 🚕 Lyft launched a new feature called Women+ Connect that helps match female and nonbinary drivers with female and nonbinary passengers.
• 🏛️ Sen. Mitt Romney (R-UT) said he won’t run for a second term as senator in 2024. (From the Left | From the Center | From the Right)

CLICKBAIT

• 📺😬 30 huge mistakes that ended up in final versions of major movies and TV shows.

Here are the most unusual, off-the-wall, and occasionally laugh-out-loud headlines from this week.

• 'Ritual mass murder' report in Chapel St Leonards was yoga class → (BBC News)
• US man goes to 777 movies in a single year, smashes world record → (NDTV)
• Cockatoo breaks speed record on tiny scooter → (UPI)
• Benedict Arnold burned a Connecticut city. Centuries later, residents get payback in a fiery festival → (Associated Press)
• UK man reclaims Guinness World Record title with 667 tattoos of daughter's name → (Deccan Herald)

Yesterday, we covered House Republicans’ decision to launch an impeachment inquiry into President Biden over allegations of corruption stemming from the business deals of his son Hunter.

❓ Our question to you: Do you agree with House Speaker McCarthy’s decision to launch an impeachment inquiry into President Biden?

• 👍 Yes: 30%
• 👎 No: 56%
• 🤷 Unsure/other: 14%

Click here to read some of the best responses.

+Note on sample size: We received 13,102 votes and 1,584 longform responses.

Ashlee Larsen was enjoying her dinner at a family restaurant in Melbourne, Australia, when her toddler got away from her. 

🔎 The search begins... She couldn't find her two-year-old son Brooklyn anywhere on the indoor playground, so she began searching through the small arcade. 

• Soon enough, Ashlee found Brooklyn, lovingly nicknamed "Dennis The Menace," in a place all kids dream about – surrounded by stuffed animals, where no adults can get to them. 

🧸 Living up to his nickname: Brooklyn had crawled into the claw machine, filling the chute with stuffed animals to block his way out. Eventually, the toddler was coaxed from the machine and went home with two new stuffed animals as collateral.

+Editor's note: This story previously ran in Positive DONUT, a separate newsletter we publish weekly that recaps all the good things happening throughout the world (your antidote to news-induced outrage/anxiety). Subscribe here for free.

The “River of No Return,” pictured above, is located in which US state?

(keep scrolling for the answer)

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