Good evening. “Pokémon, go!” = what your financial advisor may say when you ask them for the best place to put your money. Pokémon cards—the very same ones that you used to trade at recess—have turned into a lucrative investment, generating a ~3,821% monthly cumulative return since 2004, according to an index by analytics firm Card Ladder tracking trading-card values through August.

• That far surpasses the S&P 500’s ~483% jump over the same period
• …as well as Meta’s ~1,844% rise since going public in 2012.

However, Pokémon’s monster gains have raised concerns about a potential bubble. Many compare their rise to baseball cards, which famously crashed in value after companies ramped up production in the late 1980s.

P.S. Did someone forward you this email? Subscribe to The DONUT’s AM/PM updates here.

Each of the following events happened on September 10. Your challenge is to put them in the order in which they occurred by year, earliest to latest. Answers at the bottom!

• A) The Large Hadron Collider, the world's most powerful particle accelerator, conducts its first test operation. It has since allowed scientists to discover the Higgs boson particle; create quark-gluon plasma, the densest form of matter outside of a black hole; and uncover the Answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything (42).
• B) Alex Trebek makes his debut as host of the TV game show Jeopardy! He goes on to headline the show for 36 years until his death, earning a Guinness World Record for the most episodes hosted by the same presenter.
• C) A 25-year-old London taxi driver named George Smith becomes the first person ever arrested for drunk driving, after slamming his cab into a building. Smith later pleads guilty and is fined 25 shillings.
• D) In Marseille, France, Hamida Djandoubi, a Tunisian immigrant convicted of murder, becomes the last person to be executed by guillotine.

Hint: Who is—Trebek third?

Veterinarian Dr. Christine knew a lot about joint health—yet felt helpless watching her dog Pepsi lose his mobility and playful spirit. Traditional solutions weren't enough for her beloved companion.

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Dr. Christine's personal solution has now helped tens of thousands through Jope, backed by a 90-day guarantee.

Prepare for a great opportunity you can turn into a great moment—today’s Conjoiner sequence is live. And if you played it 10 other times, it might win nine. But not this sequence. Not tonight.

The first clue of today’s sequence is: “Movie about the 1980 US hockey team beating the Soviets on their way to winning gold”...

Mini

Like Charlie Kelly, today’s mini is a bit of a wild card. Can you play it right and finish the grid?

• Play today’s mini crossword here. Complete it in 58 seconds to beat the top time at DONUT HQ.

Sudoku

The feeling of completing today’s sudoku puzzle has been compared to finally untangling wired earbuds—frustrating for 30 seconds, but magical when it finally falls into place.

• Play today's puzzle here.

Click to play any (or all) of the three GOATWars’ challenges below, then pick the GOAT through a series of head-to-head matchups. This data-driven process was developed to create definitive best-of-all-time lists using a more objective approach than random bloggers just publishing controversial opinions for clicks.

• 🔋 THE GREATEST ENERGY DRINKS OF ALL TIME
• 🤔 RANKING CHARACTERS FROM ‘THE SIMPSONS,’ GREATEST TO LEAST
• 🚗 THE GREATEST CAR BRANDS OF ALL TIME

😋 THE GREATEST BREAKFAST FOODS OF ALL TIME

1. Bacon
2. Eggs
3. Breakfast Taco

Explore the full list.

🏆 THE GREATEST HEISMAN TROPHY WINNERS OF ALL TIME

1. Barry Sanders
2. Bo Jackson
3. Herschel Walker

Explore the full list.

👪 THE GREATEST SITCOM FAMILIES OF ALL TIME

1. The Simpsons (The Simpsons)
2. The Bunkers (All in the Family)
3. The Pritchetts/Dunphys (Modern Family)

Explore the full list.

Note: Results are as of the published time; these lists are dynamic and may change.

C, D, B, A

• C) 1897: A 25-year-old London taxi driver named George Smith becomes the first person ever arrested for drunk driving.
• D) 1977: In Marseille, France, Hamida Djandoubi, a Tunisian immigrant convicted of murder, becomes the last person to be executed by guillotine.
• B) 1984: Alex Trebek makes his debut as the host of TV game show Jeopardy! He goes on to headline the show for 36 years until his death, earning a Guinness World Record for the most episodes hosted by the same presenter.
• A) 2008: The Large Hadron Collider, the world's most powerful particle accelerator, conducts its first test operation.