💬 Quoted… "Here at Wood Milk Orchards, we're certain that our artisanal Wood Milk will be the only milk you'll want to drink for the rest of your life. Why? Because I said so."

In a press release published yesterday, Aubrey Plaza unveiled Wood Milk, a company whose debut product is made of “100% all-natural, milked wood” – which apparently comes from trees and “tastes nothing like milk.”

• But much like the best ice cream order on a hot summer day, here comes the twist: the press release is actually a “Got Milk”-sponsored ad. So (probably fortunately) Wood Milk isn’t actually a real thing.

🔵🔴 Stat of the Day: A record-high 49% of Americans see themselves as politically independent, roughly the same as the two major parties put together (25% apiece), per recent Gallup polling.

🤯 Did You Know?... Female giant pandas are able to spontaneously terminate their pregnancy if it came from a male panda they don’t like.

📖 Worth a Read: The economics of dating during high inflation → (The Hustle)